AWESOME Place for Swim Lessons

If you have young children and you're anything like me, you're dreading yet another round of $35 a pop swim lessons where 10-15 kids are crammed together into a 40-minute lesson run by a teenager who looks like they'd rather be playing Doom on their X-Box. My kids have been through I don't know how many rounds of lessons like this at rec centers around the city, and they've learned virtually nothing. So this summer I decided to search around for a more private alternative.

That's how I stumbled upon Donna's Dolphins.

The owner, Donna, runs private and semi-private lessons out of an indoor pool attached to her home. She also has other instructors who work for her. We met with Donna last night so that Tyler and Sydney could each have a half-hour trial lesson with her and see if we liked it.

We LOVED it. I don't know how she did it, but in the space of a half-hour, BOTH Tyler and Sydney made more progress than in almost all of the other lessons they've had combined. When Sydney first got in the pool, she didn't even want to put her face in the water to blow bubbles. But by the end of her half-hour, she was launching herself across the width of the pool, head down, kicking and blowing bubbles like she'd been doing it for years. And Tyler was floating on her back and flipping over on her tummy, doing the backstroke, and even starting freestroke at the end of her half hour. I sat at the edge of the pool with my jaw hanging open for the whole hour. "Stunned" doesn't begin to describe my reaction to their progress. I was flabbergasted. When it was Tyler's turn, Sydney wanted to stay in the pool and retrieve toys off the bottom.

Her pool is bright and friendly, with lots of toys and inflatables for kids to play around with (after they've done their lessons, of course). The environment is positive without being wishy-washy on correct swim techniques. And I liked the fact that they got right down to the business of learning swim techniques while still making it fun. One of the things that irritated me about the rec center lessons was it seemed like I was paying $35 to watch the kids play around in the water for the first 20 minutes.

At the end of their lesson, I asked both of them if they wanted to learn to swim at Donna's, and they both screamed, "Yeah!". I signed them up that same night.

Donna's Dolphins is not cheap, but when I added up all the money I've spent on lesson after lesson (sometimes repeating the same class level because the girls didn't pass the first or even second time) I figure I've already spent more than what I would have if I'd just known about Donna's Dolphins in the first place.

Anyway, if you're looking for a good place for your kids to learn solid swim techniques in a friendly environment, I highly recommend Donna's Dolphins. Check them out at www.donnasdolphins.com.

*Disclaimer* I am NOT being paid for this blog entry in any way. I was just so impressed by how well Tyler and Sydney took to it that I had to write something.

Just Because I Haven't Said Anything to Offend Anyone Yet Today

Boy, I'm probably going to be stepping in it with this post. Because on this issue, everyone seems to have an opinion - a STRONG opinion - one way or the other. And that would include me. I hope my comments come across as less sanctimonious/reactionary than the decidedly un-Christian things I've heard said in recent days.

I'm talking about Ted Haggard. Specifically, about he and his wife establishing a new church here in Colorado Springs. The two of them were interviewed on KVOR this morning, and it was an interview that made me sit up and pay attention.

I'll be the first to admit, the Bible states very clearly that no one but God Himself knows what's truly in another person's heart. And I'm in no way meaning to come off as more holy, more noble, or more deserving of God's grace than another person. But several things were said (and left unsaid) in the interview that have been nagging at me all day.

I don't question Mr. Haggard's desire to return to preaching or help hurting people, but I do seriously question his spiritual readiness to do so. Throughout the interview, he made frequent references to his "mistakes" and that he was "sorry" for what he had done, for hurting his family and nearly tearing his church apart. That's all fine and good, and he should be sorry for those things. Sorry BIG TIME. But he never acknowledged his actions as "sins" or "sinful", and never at any point did he mention that he had confessed those sins to God or repented of them. I don't remember either of those two words being uttered once in the entire interview, and that bothers me. There's a big difference between being sorry for your sins and repenting of them. I know - I catch myself blurring that line (or trying to) on a frequent basis.

James 3:1 says, "Not many of you should become teachers, my brothers, for you know that we who teach will be judged with greater strictness." And that's exactly the problem - Ted Haggard was a teacher of God's Word. Since he is held to a higher standard than the general population, it's all the more important that he emphasize things like genuine repentance from sin when he messes up. I just didn't get that from him. I also found it ironic that he named his new church (meeting at his home) St. James Church, because of the book of James's "loving support" for people who have messed up. Um, excuse me, but has he READ the book of James lately?

Maybe this is the Presbyterian in me, but I'm concerned about his return to the pulpit in large part because said return seems to be largely determined by Ted Haggard and Ted Haggard alone. He's apparently "decided" that he's been in the doghouse long enough. Where is the oversight? Is he in any kind of accountability group or under the authority of men who can vouch for his spiritual renewal following such a tremendous fall? Shouldn't there be some hoops for him to jump through?

At one point, the interviewer (I think it was Jeff Crank) asked him basically point-blank about whether Haggard thinks the existence of evil played any role in Haggard succumbing to temptation. I wish I could remember the exact wording of the question, because it was brilliant. He was handing Haggard the opportunity to share the gospel on a silver platter, and Haggard didn't take advantage of it. No mention was made about Christ paying for our sins with his blood on the cross. In fact, he skirted the issue. I have to wonder what kind of pastor wouldn't use every opportunity he could (especially one like a radio interview that reaches tens of thousands of people) to spread the gospel - after all, that's his JOB.

Okay, I'd better stop while I have my foot inserted only halfway into my mouth. I'm trying really hard not to cross the line between a careful discerner of someone's actions and words, and a holier-than-thou busybody who thinks I've got someone I don't even know all figured out.

What's your opinion of Ted Haggard's return to the pulpit?

The Dumbest Thing Said to Me in Recent Memory, and What I Learned from It

So here's an excerpt from the email that put the proverbial nail in the internet dating coffin for me (I promise this will be the last time I complain about internet dating, and my story does have a larger purpose than just to criticize this guy):

"Karate, huh? You'll never get a man to marry you if he thinks you can beat him up. LOL"

Ha ha. Hee hee. Ho ho. Ha. Ha. Haaaaa.

After I picked myself up off the floor and the debilitating stomach cramps from my rounds of raucous laughter at his incredibly witty comment had subsided, I started to get angry. I read his comment again, saying to myself, "Oh, no, he di-in't!" If I remember right, there might've even been a little head- and finger-wagging to go along with it. In my head, I was ranting to this clueless idiot how if a man can't handle a woman learning how to defend herself and her children then he's no man at all and he can just take his stupid comment and shove it up-

But then it occurred to me...didn't me being pissed off at this guy mean that, at least on some level, I cared what he thought of me? That I felt like I had to justify myself to a complete and total stranger, even if it was only in my head? Nah, it couldn't mean that...COULD IT?

The thought sent a chill down my spine, and got me wondering how many times I've been guilty of stifling myself (sorry, just had an Archie Bunker flashback for a second) because of fear of what other people might say or think of me. Some of the results aren't pretty (but they are pretty pathetic):

The shoes that are so hideously ugly I think they're cool, that I wore once and then hid them in the back of my closet because a couple of people looked at them funny.

I love to sing along with the radio in my car and tap out the beat on my steering wheel, but I won't do it at a stoplight because I don't want the people in the cars next to me to think I'm a wacko.

I don't like telling people who aren't very close friends what my book/short story ideas are about, because I'm afraid they'll think I'm a SERIOUS wacko.

My instinctive tendency when I see people looking at me for more than a second or two to think, "What? OMGosh, do I have something in my teeth? Did I suddenly become hideously disfigured on my way here from the car? Did I grow a camel hump on my back? It's got to be something bad, otherwise why is that person LOOKING at me?"

Blah blah blah...you get the point. As much as I hate to admit it, Idiot Internet Guy brought a muddy issue into sharp focus for me. For that, I guess I should thank him. *Ahem* "Thanks a lot, you-"

I care too much about what people think. Specifically, I care too much about what people think regarding things that SHOULDN'T MATTER AT ALL. Of course I should care whether I just stomped on someone's feelings like I did to the spider I once found in my bathtub, or whether I'm backsliding into sin quicker than Picabo Street slaloms down the side of a mountain (insert worried fidgeting that people will find my name-dropping pretentious). But what I look like while I'm singing in the car, whether my enjoyment of karate really is a turn-off to men, whether my lipstick is too red, etc, etc - are those things really worth hanging my hat on?

The last time I checked, there was no 11th commandment in the Bible that reads, "Thou shalt not wear Doc Marten mary janes with tiny pink and purple flowers on them." And I'm pretty sure that His opinion is the only one that really matters in the end.